There ARE Rats In Baltimore!

Michael Shrimpton wades into the controversy surrounding President Trump's latest tweets.


Racial prejudice by definition is irrational. The corollary is that if a statement is factual it can’t be racist. There are rats in Baltimore, and I don’t just mean on the city council! There are also rats in Washington, not just in Congress, indeed the biggest rat I’ve ever seen was on a side-street in DC (I never saw Bush 41). It is factually accurate, sadly, to describe Baltimore as rat-infested.

President Trump is no more a racist than Oprah Winfrey. He is by all accounts a charming man, and equally charming whether you’re black or white. Only this week he has very properly intervened in the trial in Sweden of black rapper, if that is not a tautology (are there any white rappers?), A$AP Rocky.

It should not come as a surprise, dear readers, to learn that I am not a hip-hop fan and have never been to a rap concert. Prior to his wrongful arrest I freely confess that I had never heard of A$AP Rocky and I hold no brief for him. I am not prepared to see anyone prosecuted for an offense he or she has not committed however and my desire to see justice done is evidently shared by the President. Rocky’s prosecution looks pretty eponymous to me. I am not prepared to ask for justice for myself and deny it to another.

The President was right to go at the ‘squad’ of far left Congresswomen and he was perfectly entitled to have a go at Congressman Elijah Cummings. As President of the United States Donald Trump wants American cities far better run than Baltimore is. Now I’m not pretending to be a regular visitor to Baltimore, even though the NSA are just up the road. Baltimore is one of those places, like Beirut, downtown Damascus, the West Bank and Nottingham on a Saturday night that I tend to avoid unless I’m armed. I’m well aware that the Democrats have made a real mess of the place however.

Baltimore is not alone in being badly run, sadly. London Mayor Sadiq Khan is fast making a mess of London, with the enthusiastic support of the Cabinet Office, who love bad government, as long as it’s in Britain, of course. You’ll see the odd rat in London, not to mention the odd Liberal Democrat.

Who gains from this phoney media row? The President, of course. He’s a lot smarter than his enemies give him credit. There have only been five presidents since Herbert Hoover, aka Hoobert Hever, not backed by German Intelligence, and Donald J. Trump is one of them. (The others were Franklin Delano Roosevelt, Harry S. Truman, John F. Kennedy and George W. Bush.) Just to get to the White House against German opposition is a significant achievement in itself.

BoJo’s First Week

Boris Johnson has got off to a cracking start. He’s started organising for a No-Deal Brexit, thank goodness, and swept most of the godless Remainers out of the Cabinet. Each member of the government has had to sign up to breaking free of the clammy embrace of our European enemies, sorry partners, on October 31st. People are starting to plan their parties already.

I’m not sure the EU understood the significance of the date. Combining Brexit with Halloween should be fun. The EU are adamant that they won’t reopen the Surrender, sorry Withdrawal, Agreement, so a clean break is highly likely. Regular readers of this column may recall my predicting as much in 2016. The EU were never going to agree to a deal which was in our interests.

As in 1914 and 1939 Jerry has overplayed his hand. Now it’s time to give him a good smack, although another Anglo-German war is unlikely. It’s much more likely that we’ll see a series of small wars with German client states like the Republic of Ireland, Spain or Argentina. A short war with Ireland would solve the border problem, of course, and would reunite the island of Ireland, although not necessarily in a way which would please Sinn Fein/IRA. Jerry is bound to order a ramp-up of IRA terrorist activities on the mainland.

It will be different this time, however. The link between GO2 and the IRA is now understood. Since the Republic of Ireland harbors the IRA and is a terrorist sponsoring state it may find itself going the way of Saddam Hussein’s Iraq. The Global War on Terror is not yet over. Margaret Thatcher never knew, until long after she left office, that the IRA are a German-sponsored terrorist organisation. She thought they were genuine Irish nationalists, which is why she dealt with them with kid gloves. At least one member of her government (W) knew, but as he told me years later he held out on the PM, on the advice of officials.

The key question is whether or not Boris can force out the Cabinet Secretary, ‘Ritter’ Mark ‘von’ Sedwill, the evil genius, no offense intended, at the heart of government. He is the Lord Voldemort to Boris Johnson’s Harry Potter. Sedwill is committed to undermining the Johnson government and is believed to want a puppet government led by Sir Keir ‘von’ Starmer, which would reverse the referendum result and obey German orders without question. (Jerry never likes having his orders questioned, of course.)

I understand that the plan is to have Sir Mark resign after Brexit, following which the Prime Minister will choose his own Cabinet Secretary. Theresa May never chose Sedwill – he was forced on her, in the nicest possible way of course. Unlike May however, Boris actually wants to govern the country. Theresa May was just a figurehead, one of the reasons why her government was such a failure. It failed to address a single one of the country’s problems, choosing instead to make up fake problems like climate change, to which it came up with fake answers.

If Boris fails to force Sir Mark out then his government’s achievements are likely to be limited to Brexit. He’ll probably win the next general election, but won’t be able to do anything with his majority. Like Theresa May he will be a figurehead, swinging uselessly in the wind, making policy pronouncements he won’t be able to make good.

Take the extra 20,000 police officers he’s promised, for example. He’ll get them, indeed the Cabinet Office will be only too happy to reward the police for their loyalty – policing priorities, like letting burglars and drug traffickers off the hook, arresting innocent barristers and waging war on motorists, are decided in the Cabinet Office. Whilst the Prime Minister wants the extra officers on the streets, where they might actually deter crime and catch some criminals, the Cabinet Secretary will want them in police stations doing paperwork.

If Sedwill remains the PM will be lucky to get 5,000 out of the 20,000 extra officers actually on the streets, and even those will be concentrated on tormenting motorists with trivia. Like all institutions which cave in to Cabinet Office control the police in Britain have lost credibility. They’re a joke.

If Sedwill goes, assuming he doesn’t get to nominate his successor, then the path will be open to the broad sunlit uplands which we were promised long ago and for which we have fought so hard. Offshore earnings and transnational corporations will be fairly taxed (look out Google and Amazon!), GO2 and its two narcotics cartels will be shut down, there’ll be a free trade deal with you guys and unemployment will tumble. The Armed Forces will be properly funded for the first time since 1957 and national pride will be restored. Like President Trump, Boris Johnson stands on the verge of greatness. All he needs to know is who is obstructing him and why.

I gather that the plan is to spare Sir Mark’s life as an act of mercy, although he may be required to cooperate with an MI5 inquiry in due course, on the usual terms (“your helicopter is waiting, Sir”). Unlike Sir Kim ‘von’ Darroch, Sir Mark was only tangentially involved in the events of 2012 and I wish him a long and happy retirement. The Ultimate Sanction should be reserved only for those who truly deserve it and have betrayed the State. No intelligence chief should ever take a decision which he or she cannot defend in public if the need arises.

There is even the very real possibility that the Cabinet will come to understand how the country is governed. The last Cabinet consisted almost exclusively of house-trained idiots, no offense intended, in awe of their officials.

It is almost impossible in a democracy to elect politicians with a brain. The best that can be hoped for is politicians prepared, like President Trump, to listen to independent advisers with a brain. If they don’t, then policy is determined by officials, who invariably act in bad faith, because of the reach of the DVD and its subordinate agencies like GO2.

Of course bureaucratic policy-making is always disguised as advice and accompanied by flattery. Ministers think they’re making the decisions when in fact they’re being led by the nose. The success of the absurd global warming hoax is a classic example. Tony Abbott’s government in Australia were made to look like idiots and poor old Tony ended up losing his seat, never having read Spyhunter. (We have mutual friends, but they hung him out to dry, seemingly desperate for him to fail, which he did.)

I’m pleased to say that Theresa May is not the only enemy of mine who has been forced out of office in the past week. David Lidington, who apparently sanctioned the destruction of the Aylesbury Conservative Association tapes of my voicemails in 2012, and Philip Hammond, the economically illiterate Chancellor, who was Secretary of State for Defence when the Ministry of Defence destroyed their note of my intelligence briefing, along with the recording, have also gone. Hammond is a complete fool, who knew even less about defence than he did about economics. (His field is property development and in particular the obtaining of unexpected planning consents.)

How can you be Secretary of State for Defence and not know that the National Security Agency are likely to intercept a call from your office to one of their HUMINT assets about a missing nuclear warhead? Missing nukes is one of the NSA’s areas of interest. They’re the Good Guys and they’re not going to want to see a bit of London blown up, even in East London.

Latest developments in my case

Speaking of idiots, no offense intended, the Criminal Cases Review Commission, to whom I am copying this column as a courtesy, have again declined to refer my convictions back to the relevant appeal courts. Their reasoning, if that is not too strong a word, defies belief.

The Commissioner assigned to my case, Christine Smith QC, is still clinging to the idea that laptop manufacturers arrange a separate warranty for the hard drive. This absurdity has reduced the CCRC to an international laughing stock, frankly. When did you ever buy a laptop with two warranties? Indeed the CCRC are so out of touch with reality that they appear to assume that all major bought-in components carry their own warranty.

It’s important to emphasise that at no stage did the CCRC ever consult either the laptop manufacturer, Dell, or the manufacturer of the second hard drive, Western Digital Corporation. (All their calls are of course being monitored and their systems have been compromised.)  Western Digital have stated publicly that their original equipment hard drives do not have a separate warranty. Put shortly, CCRC are directly contradicting the equipment manufacturer.

Western Digital are important in all of this. A contractor for the NSA they have very high ethical standards , as you would expect. At no stage have they ever supported the prosecution, indeed there wasn’t even a witness statement from them. Since Thames Valley Police knew full well that the case against me was fabricated that in itself isn’t surprising – the last thing they would have done is to have gone to the manufacturer of the hard drive they had substituted, corruptly, for mine. It would have given the game away.

CCRC are also still clinging to the trial and appeal courts’ conclusions regarding exhibit integrity, without ever having addressed the flaws in the Forensic Tool Kit software identified by the distinguished computer expert instructed by my solicitors, Ron Cufley BEM, a former British Army intelligence officer. They cannot even begin to explain how I might have acquired the memory stick with what was adjudged to be kiddie porn on it given that it was manufactured after I am supposed to have acquired it.

This is Forensics 101. It is not possible to acquire an item before it is brought into existence. It’s what’s known as a flaw in the prosecution case.

Ms Smith never summoned the courtesy of speaking to me, my solicitors or the expert witness. At no stage did CCRC, which is computer illiterate and desperately lacking in competent investigators, with respect, ever consult a computer expert of their own. The organisation is a waste of public money, frankly, and needs to be broken up. They’re on my list!

Christine Smith was counsel to the failed Historical Institutional Abuse Inquiry in Northern Ireland. Its report was yet another whitewash, sadly. I’m not sure whether Ms Smith understands how tired the British people are of official whitewashes and cover-ups.

No judicial inquiry in Britain has uncovered the truth since the 19th century. Not even mass murder has been enough to encourage a regard for the truth, indeed shamefully Lord Mersey was an accessory after the fact to the largest incident of mass murder on the high seas to date, the deliberate ramming of an iceberg by a German asset on the bridge of the White Star liner RMS Titanic, built and built well in Belfast.

The modern Royal Duchy
What the engine should look like!

No one should think that this nonsense is getting me down. I’m actually writing this seated comfortably in first class on GWR’s Royal Duchy express, on a glorious summer’s day, on my way to Cornwall for a short break. I’m having more fun than I’ve had in years. The Bad Guys have no idea what’s coming. They’re like the Dresden Fire Brigade in January 1945 – fat, dumb and happy, and about to become toast.

More my style!

It’s different when you’re innocent – you know that sooner or later the prosecution are going to come a cropper. It’s also a comfort being in the Intelligence Community. We look after our own. INTELCOM hits back slowly and subtly. The bent Crown Prosecution Service, for example, has been humiliated in a scandal over deliberate non-disclosure in a series of rape cases, where they tried to get innocent men jailed over bogus rape raps. There are no secrets from INTELCOM. The CPS’s firewall wouldn’t have kept out a 14 year old hacker.

There’s more coming. The jury tampering scandal at Southwark Crown Court could be the next scandal in our badly tainted criminal justice system to come out into the open. The idiots are currently prosecuting an MI6 asset without knowing who he or she is. I’ve no doubt the boys are quietly assembling dossiers on the learned judge, the CPS prosecutor and the GO2 asset on the jury. After my case the criminal justice system in this country is being treated with contempt and rightly so.

The Carl Beech Case

Carl Beech, aka ‘Nick’, the operative put up to discredit the revelations about the German agent Edward Heath, has been convicted and sentenced to 18 years (ouch). Having warned Wiltshire Police about him three years ago I’ve been proved right.

His claims about that nice man Field Marshal Lord Bramall, a D-Day veteran, were particularly egregious. No doubt Jerry was still sore about some of ‘Dwin’s’ achievements in World War II! I’ve met Dwin Bramall. He’s as straight as they come, indeed with respect I’ve never met a more charming Field Marshal.

The prosecution was interesting however, given that the CPS are still under Cabinet Office, effectively German, control. It looks as though Beech was thrown under a bus. This is one of the dangers of working for the Bad Guys. They’re called the Bad Guys because they’re bad.

Jerry is desperate to hide Sir Edward Heath’s many crimes. A truly loathsome individual, no offense intended, Sir Edward should have been shot in the war, nicely of course.

Sullying genuine intelligence by putting up a patsy to make the same claims and then discrediting him is a standard German intelligence tactic. Poor old George W. Bush was caught out by it over the Iraqi attempt to acquire uranium yellowcake from Niger. Jerry got the Italians to knock up some forgeries saying the same thing as MI6, whose intelligence was in fact spot on. It’s an old ploy, but that hasn’t stop the media falling for it.

I suppose the British media will now start singing the praises of pedophile Jimmy Saville, who supplied young boys to Heath and the then Cabinet Secretary, Lord Hunt, another really nasty individual, even by the standards of Cabinet Secretaries, no offense intended.

Mohammed Nabi

On Tuesday talented Afghani cricketer Mohammed Nabi scored an astonishing 43 off 12 deliveries in a rain-affected T20 match at The Oval, including five sixes. This was an extraordinary achievement. Before the Taliban sponsored the 9/11 attacks on New York and Washington no cricket was played in Afghanistan at all, save possibly by the British or Indian Armies during the Afghan Wars. Well done him.

Well done too to Ireland who outplayed England on the first two days of the inaugural England v. Ireland Test Match at Lord’s, which I attended on the first day. Although an international match it was slightly odd, in that players from Northern Ireland are eligible to play for Ireland, as in rugby.

I’m not sure that the Prime Minister understood that at least one member of his new government was expecting to be at Lord’s on day two. Government is important, but not that important.

Rutger Hauer (1944 – 2019)

Rutger Hauer, who sadly passed on July 19th, was one of my favorite actors. He wasn’t a major star, despite his famous appearance in Bladerunner, one of the senior executives of which was a friend of mine.

In his later career he tended to appear in low budget productions or on TV, but he was a fine actor, possibly the greatest the Netherlands has ever produced. He was highly regarded in his own country and rightly so.

By all accounts a very nice man he wasn’t afraid of playing villains, although he never played George Bush Senior. He did a very good Albert Speer however, in Inside The Third Reich. He will be missed.


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  1. Funny how you didn’t mention that almost all of the rats reside in apartment complexes owned by the president’s son in law, Jared Kushner. He has over 200 code violations which he refuses to fix.

    Donald Trump and his entire family are criminals who are completely entrenched with the deep state. People who live in glass houses should not throw stones.

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